Daftar Pertanyaan yang Aku Benci (sebagai wanita lajang)

di usiaku yang sudah 32 tahun ini ada hal -hal dan reaksi soial yang membuatku makin down dan memble .Berikut daftarnya… kira2 ada 20an :

1. “Apa kamu tidak tertarik dengan pernikahan ?”
2. “Ya, kamu hidup untuk pekerjaanmu. Saya mengerti.”
3. “Apa kamu tidak punya seseorang yang istimewa dalam hidup?”
4. “Tampaknya kamu tidak tertarik untuk menjalin kasih.”
5. “Kamu perlu lebih giat mencari pasangan.”
6. “Kalau kamu mengejar kesuksesan hidup, akan susah mendapat pria.”
7. “Kamu harus segera berkencan!”
8. “Oh Maaf kita bicara soal pernikahan, kamu pasti tidak paham.”
9. “Makanya, cepat punya anak sendiri.”
10. “Kamu terlalu banyak habiskan waktu sendirian.”
11. “Memangnya habiskan waktu sendirian menyenangkan ya?”
12. “Kenapa kamu belum punya pacar ?”
13. “Apa tidak ada pria yang kamu suka di kantor ?”
14. “Kenapa tidak minta dijodohkan saja dengan temanmu ?”
15. “Kamu hanya belum menemukan pria yang tepat.”
16. “Wow jadi kamu tidak masalah nonton dan jalan sendirian ?”
17. “Kapan kamu akan menikah?”
18. “Hati-hati, waktu berjalan sangat cepat.”
19. “Di luar sana banyak pria lajang loh.”
20. “Makanya jangan kerja terus.”

rasanya aku pengen teriaaaaaak…. aku juga gak mau seperti ini, tapi apa daya “AKU BELUM BERUNTUNG”.

Nilai kepercayaan diriku makin lama menurun ke level K. Semoga aku bisa segera keluar dari situasi hidup yang menyebalkan ini

“You don’t have to be perfect to share..”

Sebuah foto yang mempunyai berjuta makna, dan begitu indahnya dunia ini bila seluruh umat manusia mau berbagi dengan sesama tanpa membedakan latar belakang dan penampilan fisik

12 Reason you’re afraid of Relationship (including ME)

Sometimes you might feel like you’re desperate to be in a relationship…until the possibility is right in front of you. (It’s like when you agree to go skydiving with a friend — then you see them jump out of the plane and you think, “No way am I doing that! Are you crazy?”) When trying to find love, often fear is the one, huge thing standing in the way. But you learned when you were three — with the whole “monsters under the bed” thing — that some fears are imaginary. Here are 12 ways fear interferes with love, and why you should kick it to the curb (and say yes to that relationship).

1. You’re afraid of heartbreak.

Let’s get this one out of the way right off the bat. Everyone is afraid of getting hurt. (Except for several of the villains in The Care Bears , I suppose. Those cold-hearted a-holes.) Doesn’t that make you feel better? If life were one big bumper car game, and we were all afraid of getting hurt, we would be a little more gentle with each other, wouldn’t we be? So let’s just all agree to be more honest with each other about our feelings, and more kind to one another in our relationships, and hope that some asshole doesn’t break the rules and ram us from out of nowhere, sending us to the chiropractor. But if you are afraid to enter a relationship because you are afraid of getting hurt, you are both cliche
and destined to go nowhere. (And as Dr. Phil would say , “how’s that working out for you?”)

2. You’re afraid to not be single anymore.

Being single is awesome. But unless you have very, very strong convictions to be single for the rest of your life (hey there, my nuns sisters!), you are going to have to change sometime. You might like being single now. But ask yourself: do you want to be alone for the rest of your life? Picture yourself living alone in 40 years. Are you okay with that? The answer to that question can be yes. But if you are unsure, and there is someone in your life who you are interested in exploring a relationship with, and they are standing there with their arms open to you, and they are willing to help you out of your comfort zone into a new zone of possible relationship awesomeness, then for God’s sake, let them.

3. You’re afraid to let someone get to know you.

If you haven’t been in a lot of relationships, it might seem strange to let someone get to know you — to see you disheveled in the morning, to see you at your best and worst, to truly let someone into your life. You might think the only reason you seem desirable to anyone is because they don’t know you that well — because you have managed to put the best version of yourself on display — something you can’t necessarily do when you throw yourself into a honest relationship. But remember that you can’t hide forever and nobody is perfect. Your new boyfriend/girlfriend is not perfect, either. We’ve all received the memo, and we are all okay with it.

4. You’re afraid that love doesn’t work.

Maybe you never saw successful couples when you were young, or maybe your parents got along so well you thought, “No way will I get that lucky!” Either way, you can’t give up. Love never works perfectly all the time, but that doesn’t mean it’s not the best thing you will ever experience — the bad and the good makes that so.

5. You’re afraid you’re too busy.

If you are afraid to enter a relationship because you don’t think you have time, there is a much bigger problem, here, and it has nothing to do with relationships. You are hiding behind your work/hobby/Law & Order obsession! What are you afraid of? If your job is standing in the way of the possibility of you feeling happy and fulfilled in a relationship and in love, what else will it stand in the way of? Your sanity? Your health? Your passion for metallurgy?

6. You’re afraid you won’t find this one exact person who might not exist or be right for you anyway.

It is really good to have high standards. But! Sometimes we look for someone in particular for weird reasons. Say, you thought you would be with a creative person, or you assumed you were strictly partial to blondes, or you had in your mind that you were only attracted to Kal Penn- lookalikes after seeing The Namesake in 2007. (His lips: I die.) Tear that all away. You will be glad you did.

7. You’re afraid of a faux niggles

I’m not saying to ignore your relationship niggles . I’m saying you should explore them really, really closely. Are they leading to actual, legitimate reasons for concern? Say the girl you have been seeing always wears culottes. That is weird. And it drives you crazy and makes you uncomfortable and makes you think “ehh I don’t… aaaa… she… culottes! Always? I can’t take her anywhere!” But something like that doesn’t matter. Embrace this girl and her culottes.

8. You’re afraid of leaving your family.

My mom used to yell at me because I was kind of depending on her to fill some of my boyfriend requirements, like being there for me, caring for me when I was sick/stressed/sad, talking to me on the phone, sending me funny pictures of cats, etc. I also never thought I would find a guy my family approved of, so I sort of let being in a relationship become, like, my 40th priority. I know that people do this with their parents and siblings. I know a few people who have had terrible tragedies in their families and felt this invisible pull to defend and dedicate themselves completely to their families until the end of time. I don’t know what that is like and I don’t want to pretend to, but I do know this: your family members are going to go out and finding relationships for themselves, or they already have. You deserve that, too. Your family will still be there for you, and they will be happy for you. (I wish someone would have pounded this into my brain years ago.)

9. You’re afraid long distance can’t work.

If you really want to be in that relationship, you will make it work because you won’t see any other option. Long distance relationships are a shit-ton of work. But don’t make that an excuse for breaking it off if you think it can succeed and make you happy, because it might even make your relationship better .

10. You’re afraid to change.
Yeah, being in a relationship means you’re going to have to stop doing certain things (like spending every single night watching Curb Your
Enthusiasm reruns eating dinner in your underwear talking to your grandma on the phone — trust me, I know ) but you should probably stop doing that stuff anyway. You might have to stop smoking or spending $80 on cocktails every night at that new hotel bar or traveling alone and not telling anyone where you are going, but you will feel good about it later. (Still call your grandmother, though. Fit it in,somewhere!)

11. You’re afraid to succeed.

More of us are relationship masochists than we like to admit. Sometimes it feels good to fight and break up and cry and get angry. We are all really f*cked up people who love pain. But if you don’t want to start a relationship (or you want to leave one) because you think it’s going too well and you don’t know how to handle it, let me tell you this: you can handle it and you deserve it and JUST TRY IT. Everything is going to be okay. And if it’s not, you can cross that bridge when you come to it.

12. You’re afraid that the person will be opposed to your _(fill in the blank)_ lifestyle.

Well, yeah, they might be. But you never know. When you assume, you make an ASS out of U and ME. (If this is the first time you are hearing that, you’re welcome.) Communication is very important in all relationships, obviously. You might just have found your perfect match.

SOEGIJA

This Film wants to render humanitarian stories in times of Nation WAR of Indonesia (1940-1949). The name Soegijo (played by Nirwan Dewanto) who was appointed as Bishop of the Roman Catholic Church in native Indonesia. For him one humanitarian, although of different Nations, origin, and differensial. and war is the story of the splitting of the big family of mankind. When Japan came to Indonesia (1942), Mariyem (Annisa Hertami) separate from Maryono (Abe), her sister. Ling Ling (Andrea Reva) is separated from her mother (Olga Lydia). it seems that separateness is not only experienced by those who colonized, but also by the colonizers. Nobuzuki (Suzuki), an army of Japan and Budhist adherents, he never have the heart of a child, because he also had a child in Japan. Robert (Wouter Zweers), a Netherlands Army who always feel so great war machine, eventually also touched his heart by innocent baby that he found on the battlefield. He misses home, he misses her mother. in the middle of the war was Hendrick (Wouter Braaf) discovered her love remains unable to because the war. Soegijo want to reunite the big family of humanity love stories which has been torn apart by a violent war.

 

Menjaga Orangtua Itu Berkat Bukan Beban

http://www.dayswithmyfather.com/

Menghormati orangtua adalah satu-satunya perintah di dalam Alkitab yang menjanjikan umur panjang sebagai hadiah (Efesus 6: 1-3). Salah satu bentuk bakti dan penghormatan kita terhadap orangtua adalah dengan menjaga dan mendampingi masa tua mereka. Berikut beberapa tips untuk para single agar tanggung jawab menjaga orang tua menjadi tugas yang menyenangkan :

Terima Perubahan Mereka

Pertambahan usia orangtua akan diiringi dengan berbagai perubahan baik fisik, maupun psikologis. Secara fisik, tentu mereka sudah bukan orang-orang kuat seperti dulu, akan banyak kemunduran dalam hal tenaga, daya tahan maupun daya ingat mereka. Selain Perubahan fisik, perubahan psikologis pasti terjadi. Ada banyak orang yang masuk usia lanjut menjadi pribadi yang lebih sensitif atau bahkan mungkin bersikap kekanak-kanakan.

Hal-hal seperti inilah yang harus kita pahami, kita tidak boleh menuntut mereka menjadi seperti mereka ketika masih muda. Sebaliknya, kita yang harus berusaha menyesuaikan diri dengan keadaan mereka saat ini.

Hindari Miskom, Lepaskan Pengampunan

Perbedaan generasi antara orang muda dan orangtua, sikap orangtua yang berubah menjadi kekanak-kanakan, ekspresi orangtua yang kadang sulit diterjemahkan, dan lain sebagainya adalah contoh hal-hal yang sangat rawan untuk terjadi miskomunikasi yang berujung pertengkaran.

Hal ini harus kita sikapi dengan bijaksana, caranya adalah dengan melepaskan pengampunan. Seperti apa yang Alkitab katakan, janganlah simpan amarahmu terlalu lama agar jangan sampai hal ini menjadi akar pahit. Komunikasikan segala sesuatu sesuai porsinya.

Cerdik Membagi Waktu

Tuntutan pekerjaan dan kebutuhan sosialisasi kita dengan orang lain, membuat kita tidak bisa memberikan seluruh waktu kita untuk menjaga orangtua. Karena itu kita harus bisa bijaksana dalam membagi waktu termasuk memberikan prioritas. Orangtua membutuhkan teman bicara, jika kita tidak bisa selalu bersama mereka, mintalah bantuan keluarga atau kerabat untuk mencukupi kebutuhan orangtua kita ini.

Panti Jompo Bukan Jawaban

Tempat terbaik untuk orangtua menjalani hari tua mereka adalah keluarga. Karena itu sangat tidak disarankan untuk memasukan orangtua ke panti jompo, hal ini akan membuat mereka merasa terbuang dan akan buruk bagi kondisi kesehatan mereka.

Tingkatkan Pengetahuan

Pengetahuan kita tentang kesehatan orangtua sangatlah terbatas, untuk itu kita harus terus meningkatkan pengetahuan tersebut lewat berkonsultasi dengan ahli seperti dokter, ataupun membaca buku. Kita perlu mengetahui apa yang baik dan tidak untuk kesehatan orangtua, meliputi makanan, jenis olahraga, maupun hal-hal lainnya yang akan menunjang kesehatan mereka.

Tumbuhkan Iman Orangtua

Tidak semua orangtua dewasa dalam imannya. Dengan membiasakan untuk memiliki saat teduh dan waktu berdoa bersama, kita telah membantu mereka untuk lebih dekat dengan Tuhan.

credit : jawaban.com

Oscar Wilde’s story “The Nightingale and the Rose”

In the story, a young man falls in love with a girl, who tells him that she will dance with him at the upcoming ball if he hands her a red rose. However, the boy only has white roses growing in his garden and he becomes very upset. A nightingale hears him crying and is taken by his story. The bird decides to get a red rose for him.

He flies to two different bushes asking them for a red rose, but they have only yellow and pink roses. He then flies to a bare bush that tells him that it can grow a red rose only if the nightingale gives up his life for it and sings to him the entire night as the thorn pierces his heart. The blood of the bird will help to grow a beautiful red rose. So the bird decides to do this and kills himself.

The next day, the boy finds the flower and brings it to the girl. The girl responds that another man gave her jewelry and that is a far more expensive gift than any flower…and rejects him.

KPOP PARADOX

i really HATE KPOP with all their dirty industry, but i fucking love yunjae,yoosu,JYJ & TVXQ5

Me as Gollum

 

Of all the characters in J.R.R. Tolkien’s fantasy, Golum had roles that very humanly  characters it represents the human nature that greedy, grumpy, lonely, desperate to be loved and so on.
I always thought Gollum just became what he was because he was weak and gave into temptation, but these lines changed my opinion of him:
“No loyal friend
Was ever there for me”

I believe that that’s referring to Sam, who saved Frodo from the destructive powers of the rings a few times in the movies. Maybe if Gollum had had someone like Sam around to help him he wouldn’t have turned into the miserable creature he was..

 

Introverts need time alone, but we can also get lonely

my own video about introvert personality

 

For the many years I didn’t know what an introvert was, I told people close to me that I guessed I was a “loner.” It was the only way I could describe the fact that although I might chitchat and joke around with others when we were all together, when it came time to run errands I enjoyed just taking off alone. It usually did not occur to me to ask someone if they wanted to come and look at [clothes, sofas, books, plants, cat food] with me. After all, I was the one who needed whatever it was, and I can definitely think better and make better decisions when no one is talking to me. As I’ve said before, I have a lot of great friends I’ve made over the years, and I really enjoy their company. But it’s just in my nature to head out on my own when I need to do something. For lack of a better term, I used the term “loner” to label myself quickly when people would express hurt at being left out of all the fun I was having. (Sadly, the news media and people who just don’t know any better often use that term to mean someone who’s actually antisocial: one who hates society and may even do active harm like mass shootings).

Although I need to be alone a certain percent of my time, and I have a blast when reading or doing other things on my own, I’m also capable of being really lonely. Once in a while I have found myself in a situation where I was alone for a weekend and wanted to do something with a friend but for some reason the ones I’d try to contact were unavailable. Maybe it was a holiday weekend or just a coincidence, but I have found myself alone on a weekend with no plans at all and realized I was terribly lonely. By late on a Saturday afternoon of such a weekend, I have actually been the one who’s raking or weeding in the front yard, talking to any and every neighbor who walks by, or walking a few miles, hoping I’ll run into someone I know as I go. When that happened, I wondered – am I not a loner like I thought? What happened to the woman who loves to run out alone to do her own thing? It just didn’t add up! The answer is, it’s not that I want to be alone all the time. I like people and enjoy them very much. I just can’t be with people all of the time. I am an introvert.

As an introvert, my battery has to be charged, just like the battery of a laptop. When the battery is fully charged, a laptop runs great and is quite valuable. No one would say a laptop is weird or bad because it has to be recharged. We simply learn that that is how laptops are designed so we make sure we charge them before we need them. Extroverts are more like basketballs. As long as someone is there doing something with them, basketballs have plenty of energy, which they get by being bounced by a person. When they are left alone, they aren’t bouncing anymore. No one would say that a basketball is useless just because it doesn’t jump off the shelf and bounce by itself. We understand that basketballs need people to give them the energy to go.

If you love to run errands alone or love to eat lunch at your desk at work or anything else like that, don’t let anyone make you feel as if you are “odd” or “aloof” or worse still, “antisocial.” If you recharge your batteries best when you get some time alone, you are most likely an introvert, and just knowing that is so awesome and explains so much. Now you know why you start feeling anxious in a long meeting or when house guests won’t leave. That feeling is totally expected for introverts, and now you’ll know that you need to break away – alone – in order to feel and function at your best. Likewise now you can understand why you may feel lonely today, when it was just yesterday you were craving some time alone. Introverts are normal human beings (despite what you may have heard) and of course we need others. In fact we form very strong and deep connections, when we find people we really like and like to be with. Once we understand our needs for companionship vs. solitude, we can come closer to the right balance where we get plenty of blissful and refreshing alone time, yet we never get all the way to lonely.

credit : http://introvertzone.com/introverts-need-time-alone-but-can-get-lonely

There is no happily ever after Love Story in this world

i love this Little Mermaid version than disney version, it so sad how you can love someone but that is love is never return. Then it is always you that are hurt. I don’t kow why you would put youself up for the pain when you know there is going to be one. it too sad.